Hermana Ostler’s
Update – November 25, 2014
How do you start an email like this one? How do
you try to explain your love for a country, people, culture, language, church,
gospel, God, and Savior that you have come to know and care about for so long
and with so much energy? How do you really explain what it means to you to be a
representative of Jesus Christ every single day? To live to make others feel
happy and learn the path of true joy? How do you do it?
The truth is, you can’t. I can’t
explain to you how much I love my mission. It is what I live and breathe. And
then you realize that those beautiful days of little moments of heavenly bliss
are coming to an end, that a new life is coming your way and you can’t stop it,
you just have to learn to embrace it.
I love Peru. It is where I came
to love God, to want to do His will always. It’s where I learned what a true
disciple of Christ is, and it is where I realized how far away I am from being
one, and it is where I learned that it will take me a lifetime to walk the
discipleship road.
I love the people I have come to
know and love. They are my brothers and sisters, they are the people I was
called to help. I love them with all that I have. It makes me so happy to know
that many of them have come a little bit closer to God by hearing His words
through me. I will never stop loving them because it was when I gave them my
whole attention and forgot myself that I came to really know who I was. I love
the way they talk, the way they feel so deeply, and the way they recognize the
Spirit. I want to be like these people in so many ways. I came to change them
and they changed me.
I love my companions. ALL OF
THEM. They taught me so much. Hermanas Hansen, Masquez, Warner, Luque, Sanchez,
Tamariz, and Valverde. What amazingly beautiful and marvelous people I have had
the chance to teach, laugh, and learn with.
I love the gospel of Jesus
Christ. Why did I “kick against the pricks” for so long? Why is it that I
couldn’t understand that obedience brings freedom? How is it that I thought
that being “different” from my parents was only being the same as everyone else
in the world?
I am free. I am free because I
came to know that Christ lives, that He loves me. That he loved me so much that
he suffered for every single idiotic and cruel thing I have done in my life.
How many drops of blood did He shed for me? How many tears fell from that
perfect man’s face thanks to my own rebellious habits? I will never know, but
one thing I DO know.
That He lives. He lives and loves
us. He is a real person. I do not represent an elaborate fable that has been
passed down and distorted over the years. I represent The Son of God. I testify
that of His church and gospel every day, and though doing so, I have come to
know that it really is true. His word is what I live by, and I hope I can live
and die living and worshiping the God I love.
My mission has not been perfect.
Far from it. I have not done what I should have done many times. I have cried
and cried over my weaknesses and I have begged God to make me strong so that I
could bring His children to Him. I know He lives and I will be eternally
grateful for this beautiful year and a half I have had to serve him with all my
heart.
I love you all.
Hermana Alex
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