The Capitalistic Heart

This past week a particular tear-your-façade-off-and-see-who-you-really-are type of question has been challenging the way I see myself and the world around me.

Do I have a Capitalistic Heart?

Before explaining myself further, I would like to point out that this is by no means a political term, at least in the way that I am thinking of it. Communism, capitalism, socialism, and other economic systems have their pros and cons, blah blah blah. They’re all trying to create prosperity in their own way and they’re all succeeding and failing to some degree, I suppose.

The Alex definition of the “Capitalistic Heart” is: If You Have, I Cannot.

If you get a raise, I cannot.

If you have wonderful experiences traveling the world, I cannot.

If you have a dream job that also allows you to live comfortably, I cannot.

If you get likes on social media, I cannot.

If people think you’re funny/beautiful/smart, I cannot be considered those things.

If you do really fun things on the weekend, I cannot.

If you have enough resources to buy a house, move to your dream town, or buy a brand- new mountain bike, I cannot.

I thought this picture of Jackson worshiping the trees in Kauai seemed the most appropriate for this topic? 

The Capitalistic Heart believes that there are winners and losers. The Capitalistic Heart thinks that someone else’s happiness will taint and diminish their own. The Capitalistic Heart will not share because then there is not enough for oneself. Maybe I am the only person with this kind of dirty laundry, but I find myself thinking this in the very secret crevices of my soul. Sometimes I even find myself putting others down in my head, because hello! I have to win sometimes too! There can’t be too people in the world who truly love the outdoors, wear DI clothes, and ride their bikes everywhere. Everybody else must be some kind of fraud.

Ewww. I hate myself just writing this pile of rotting Baboon crap down.

Maybe this is why poverty is the unconquerable enemy of this world? Is this why the sad and lonely look for validation in vain? Does this explain why people are dissatisfied when they see others being happy? Maybe poverty and equality isn’t really about politics, policies, and programs? (Did anyone see my intentional alliteration??) Light bulb! What if all of these nasty byproducts of society really originate from the Capitalistic Heart in all of us?

Doctor’s Prescription for Eliminating the Capitalistic Heart: However cliché and obvious this message may be, it all comes down to love. There is enough happiness acreage on earth and heaven above for everyone to make their own little homestead. So I am going to try a little harder to be a little better at loving others enough to want their happiness. I want people to succeed at their dreams! I want them to enjoy the wonderful lifestyle I have, which means I will be willing to give, validate, and sacrifice for others. I want others to have enough to live comfortably and I want to believe that that is possible for everyone. And I hope I never forget that. How shameful it would be to have enough to share, only to hoard it for myself in an effort to win the non-existent Happiness Race. In the words of Grace Noell Crowell, "because I have been given much, I too must give." 

And now I don't know how to end today's edition of Free Advice You Didn't Ask For...

Peace, Love, Chicken Nuggets?

My own little acre of happiness

The Quest Continues: Switzerland Round 2

NOTE: THIS IS REALLY OLD. SUMMER 2015 OLD. Apparently I was looking for a Swiss man and ended up finding a Massachusetts man a couple months later. Kind of funny how life works out. Just posting this because my love of Switzerland still exists even though the Find A Swiss Husband Quest ended a long time ago. 

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Remember when Elise and I rode bikes around Switzerland trying to find husbands? Well, we failed in our mission. Yeah, we got some nice pictures and explored the most gorgeous country in the world but something was missing, ya know? To be specific, we were missing some tall, hunky, rich Swiss men. 

But I'm an Ostler. I don't give up. If I want a Swiss man I will do all in my power to get one.

So I went back. 

With my parents. 

They thought we were going for a leisurely mountain bike trip in the Alps, but I knew better. 

FIRST CLASS BABY. They had open seats and so we snatched them up. If I ever become rich then I will only fly first class on long flights. The luxury! The hot fudge sundaes! The unlimited super hero movies and romantic comedies! The noise-cancelling headphones! The 180 degree seats! Do I sound pretentious yet?

Some people may be wary of being a third-wheel on their parent's vacation. I suppose they have their reasons, but I don't understand them at all. Being a young single adult and roaming about Europe with parents is the only way to go. Lest we forget, I had just done this trip two months before. Parents think differently than students. They aren't worried about keep a trip as dirt cheap as possible. They're okay with sleeping in a hotel every night, not in a field. They stay away from merely eating apples and bread from the grocery store and GO OUT TO EAT AT RESTAURANTS. Parents are the best to travel with. And when you have a Sandy and Shane as parents, you really can't go wrong. They are so rad and I have never been afraid to admit that I prefer hanging out with them to most people.

We boarded a train and went as far east as possible to a little Alp town called Scuol. GO THERE. It's literally the end of the Swiss train system. Another little hop and skip is Italy and Austria. The train ride was great besides the fact that my parents slept most of the way (apparently real adults get jet lag. Long live eternal youth). 

MOST MAGICAL MOMENT OF THE TRIP. Watching a grown man (with a slightly corpulent body) in a belly shirt soak his whole body in water in the bathroom and then come out and dance ferociously throughout the whole train. It was like I had met my spirit animal.

My Dad had the case of the traveling poopies the first day so my Mom and I went on a mountain bike ride that takes you over the mountains into Italy. It was so beautiful.

I spy with my little eye....a creep.

Staying in hostels with your parents is always an interesting experience. 

Picnic and swan adventures in Zug. This is honestly my favorite memory from the trip. Do you ever feel nostalgic in the middle of a experience because you know its a golden one that you will remember forever? It was so peaceful and healing to spend so much time with my parents, not worrying so much about getting anywhere in particular. 

I wish I lived out there. So perfect. 

We definitely were cheaters on this mountain bike ride right outside of Scoul because we took the gondola to get up. 

Who knew border crossing was so easy out there? This little piece of string marks the Italian-Swiss border. 

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Walking through the tunnel to Italy!

This is a little out of order but perfectly describes our journey trying to get back home to Hood River. A complete nightmare involving delayed flights, overly crowded airports, and rental car fiascos. At the end my mom had to sit in this wheelchair and stare off into space to escape it all. 

I forgot the name of this little village that we biked to from Scoul. It was just two houses situated in this gorgeous valley. There were swings overlooking it and donkeys and adorable Swiss children running around. I wanted to stay there forever, 

On Sunday we couldn't find an LDS church in the area so we went to a Lutheran service that was in that beautiful church in the background. It was such a neat experience. We had no idea what was happening the entire time (Swiss-German), but we loved experiencing such a integral part of the Swiss culture. 

If you ever happen to spend some time in Zug, I recommend checking out the Hollgrotten Baar. They're these super cool underground caves that have cool light shows and music playing throughout. 

Scoul is famous for its healing mineral waters, which are found in these little drinking fountains all around town. As you can see by my face it was horribly rancid. But I'm healed! 

Scoul is a must! The Eastern-most part of Switzerland and absolutely adorable. 

Zug was a really adorable mini-city that we thought would be worth our time. It definitely was! They had free city bikes that you could use for the entire day. We may have gone "off-roading" more than these bikes were accustomed to.  

Lake Zug

Typical Customs Photo

Excuse the lack of detail. It is kind of hard to remember all of the little things two years later. I just couldn't resist posting these pictures because they brought back so many good memories. I am looking forward to documenting even more adventures coming up. 

I'm Baaaaaaaaack! (Whether You Wanted Me Or Not)

I know this isn't going to break the Internet, but I just want everybody to know that in the words of the great philosophizing musical group, AC/DC, I'm....

"Back in black

I hit the sack 

I've been too long I'm glad to be back

Yes, I'm let loose 

From the noose...

Forget the hearse 'cause I never die."

I'm actually so tickled that I am doing this because my Mom is going to be so happy! Her and all of my other fans who have been pleading, begging, and weeping for more of my Nobel-Literature type work.

So how does one go about updating their readers (Mom) on 17 months of their life that said readers (Mom) already are fully aware of?

*cricket cricket*

I guess I'll figure that detail out as I go.

These last 17 months have been full of basically the same things that I was doing before. I still try to bike, ski, climb, and adventure more than I work (although this has become more difficult after graduating college and finally having to support myself). I still wear clashing patterns and have way too many plant babies. I'm still eating candy off the floor, much to the chagrin of everyone around me.

It's all pretty much the same....

Except now I have a BOY to do all these things with me! (Besides eating candy off the floor because he thinks that's gross.)

Are you going to make me remove this photo, Jackson? 

A BOYYYYYYYYY! 

And I can post really creepy things about him because we are legally wed and I work 40 very tedious hours a week to supply his peanut butter obsession! 

So life is really good right now. The kind of good where you're eating an incredibly scrumptious pizza and you keep turning to the person next to you and saying, mouth full of cheesy dough, "this is really good pizza" and the person keeps giving you a happy greasy pizza smile in reply and you both just know that this pizza experience is ultimately the reason why you were born. 

I hope that metaphor speaks to you like it does to me. 

Anyway, I look forward to writing a bit more often because all joking aside, I really miss it right now. It feels nice to have a platform to discuss the things I think about on a daily basis and that are important to me. For example, how can we as a society overcome the awkward tendency to whisper "hello" to people when we pass them in the hallway at work? Why is this a thing? I hate it. I hate that I do it. Also, why does my little cactus close his flower every time I water him from the top? Why isn't this information easily accessible on the interwebs? These are just some topics I feel I need to address here.

Till we meet again, my blog! Hopefully it's not after 17 months and I have to update you on having twins, or something.