My Paradise: Hood River Summer

Oh November. You make me miss summer. You're full of group projects, certifications that take up entire weekends, a farewell to mountain biking, and a overwhelming desire to eat everything in sight. Transition months are hard on me. They're that weird gray area where one sport is phasing out (mountain biking) while the next one is still not ready (come quicker, skiing). So instead of finishing my report on McDonalds I'm going to reminisce my magical summer in my magical hometown.

Before I begin, have I ever told you how much I love Hood River? I think I have here, here, and here. But in case you didn't know, Hood River is the most perfect place in the world. But don't move there, please! A major reason I love it so much is that is is small. I prefer that it stay that way. If it ever gets big enough to have a bonafide public transporation system I am going to scream. (For another time: Discuss   my deep fear of being stuck in a unwanted conversation on public transportation.)

So let me sum up my lacksadaisical and magical summer in one blog post.

 

The summer began with a job search. I had just spent weeks traveling the world and it was time to get some cash flow in. Above one can see the job options I came up with. I made the mistake of leaving this list on the table and when I came back MY FATHER had added "butt model" as a potential summer job. HMMPH. 

In the end I didn't end up getting a job because,  t r a v e l i n g.  And my sister was home from Abu Dhabi and we needed to tag team with the babies so everyone got in a mountain bike ride every day. Geesh, I sound like an entitled snob. Ignore me.

I want everyone to know that I am literally the worst person to tandem bike with. I am the Tandem Dictator, hear me roar. But honestly can I just say that at least I am safer to ride with than Grace flippin' Vuihkola? There was one moment when we were barreling down a hill and Grace was in front and TOOK BOTH HANDS OFF OF THE HANDLEBARS. I think I had to clean out my pants after that one.

I love my baby brother. Living at home is so fun because I get to terrorize him on a daily basis.

Some pictures of Oregon being green and perfect, just because it is green and perfect.

Every day. Every day.

Another reason why I love Hood River. All of the plants I get to take care of! I could honestly spend my whole day gardening. My dream is to have tons of babies and teach them how to love weeding and biking. Super ambitious, I know.

This is my dear, sweet, terrifying best friend from the 3rd grade. My goodness, this woman is crazy. Meet Grace, the dog-obsessed woman who likes to almost murder me on a tandem.

This was the summer of windsurfing. I don't want to brag, but I ended up going 34 times....I wanted to brag. Sorry.

When Dad leaves town and us women have to figure out the irrigation system. Pure chaos.

Kenzie and I literally cannot take pictures together anymore. Gilly for life. 

Seattle and Bainbridge Island 

My mom and I made a little jaunt up north sometime in the beginning of the summer (so vague because this was like, half a year ago). It involved Greek food, my dear cousin Hanna and her family, a crazy parrot, and my mom hitting a Porsche in the Suburban. hahahahahahhaha. It was a classic Sandy moment. We were pulling into my cousins street and my mom was so busy waving at Hanna that she didn't realize she was trying to park on top of the most adorable black luxury car. 

We forwent going to Pikes Market/Space Needle because how many times do I need to watch people throw fresh fish back and forth? I recommend going to Baindbridge Island by ferry. Take bikes! We went around the entire island expecting a leisurely ride. Prepare yourself to go uphill both ways. I'm not sure how it's possible but I don't think we ever went downhill. 

When in the Seattle area, go to Mora Iced Creamery. I got two flavors of chocolate and they have liquor in them? I didn't realize this until later but let me tell you, I HAVE NEVER HAD MORE DELICIOUS ICE CREAM. Is this why people drink?

You can't see Lila the parrot on Hanna's shoulder...but she is there. People and animals typically like me, it must be my endearing charm and quick wit? But Lila did not. I did my Velociraptor run impersonation and Lila went nuts. She flew towards me, talons outstretched, a warrior screech emanating from her beak. I have  never been so afraid for me life. Luckily my face is still intact. For future reference, Lila doesn't like Velociraptors.

My second cousins may be the most behaved and sweetest children I have ever met.

Babies made it to the U.S.A.

Jessica got me the most adorable Penny board for my birthday. I still have scars from trying to hang 10 on this baby.

Important side note: This summer I had a serious case of Baby Hunger. I would lug these creatures everywhere hoping the general public thought I was a hip, young mother. If you want to compliment me then tell me that they look like my offspring.

Jesper and I spent an absurd amount of time playing with chalk and bubbles on the driveway.

4th of July 

Kenzie and I decided to run the 7 mile run for the Indepedence Day parade. We poached it because who wants to pay 12 dollars for the wrestling team? It was like a mini class reunion and our cross country coach cheered us on and how does everyone in this town know us? Running through the parade was like walking the red carpet, we could hear people yelling "Go Kenzie! Go Alex!" at every direction. Small towns. You can't beat them. 

Then we went to some BBQs and rode the jet ski and watched the fireworks and it was fantastic. 

Just a casual picture of my daughter congratulating me after my race. Kenzie's the Fairy Godmother.

This picture kills me. We came inside and found Jesper changing her penguin's bottom. (For all potential visitors, Jesper calls the penguin an owl and my mother insists that everyone call it an owl as well. It's a penguin, Ma.)

Grandma Cozy came to visit! She is the sassiest and dearest woman.

Floras Lake, Oregon

It's not a true Oregonian summer without a trip to windsurf at the coast. Floras Lake will always have a special place in my heart. I met my first boyfriend there (hey Josh!), learned to windsurf, and basically lived out a Teenage Dream music video there. I can't quite explain why Floras is so magical, but it is. We had some sea kayaking wars in the reeds (my Dad and Jessica would hide on the banks and ambush us, screaming "RAMMING SPEED!" It was pure chaos. They had reeds in their hair and my dad rolled down a muddy bank into the river? hahahaha. It was so fun. 

Other things we did in Floras:

• Windsurf several times a day. 
• Tandem windsurfing! This is where there is one board and two sails and is a great way to make or break a friendship. I have never laughed so hard as when I did it with Kenzie and Reed was attacking us on his kiteboard... I can't stop smiling just thinking of it. 
• A ridiculous amount of card games and Settlers. (I am not a card player. It's better to just not invite me, all I do is stare off into space.) 
• Daily double scoops of Chocolate Brownie Thunder ice cream at Langlois Market. 

 

My punishment for being the worst at cards.

Live music on Thursdays at the Ruins. If you don't mind watching old people drunk dance it's a pretty fun place. But the real reason I put this picture up was THAT MAN'S PONY TAIL.

If I ever end up graduating and leaving Provo I'm going to miss these guys the most.

Jenna came to visit Kenzie so I was lucky enough to tag along. I love Jenna!

My happy place is to read books and eat strawberry after strawberry.

Before you jump to conclusions, I do not drink. This was at the premiere of Brendo's kiteboarding movie BiP2. Go see it. It's awesome. There were also fire dancers there. Gotta love Hood River. 

When all your church friends are latinos and they bring you about 15 cucumbers, just because.

My Hero.

Bike, Bike. Bike.

Temple dates with the mommy.

 

The only picture I have from our "Girls Night" in Portland. #priorities

Oneonta Gorge.

Rachel and her husband came and visited! I love playing tour guide so come see me whenever. And I'm being serious, I love proving to everyone that my town is the best in the world.

QUEEN.

Jesper's way of asking to come inside. I swear she was dressed every morning but she always ended up running about naked by the end.

Jesper got a "balloon room" for her birthday. We all were overjoyed.

Herman the Sturgeon. Legend (according to Shane the Notorious Liar) has it that the original Herman was attacked by a Native American on his Spirit Quest. We think my father was lying about this but it is true that there are multiple Herman's and that every time one dies or is stolen they crown a new Herman.

WATERFALLS, GALORE.

My new pollera. The plan is to get a new one every time I go to Peru.

Fresh grape juice from the wine. A great way to get a raging sugar headache.

I call this series of pictures "Bear and His Many Moods).

We only managed to take the Hobie Tiger out ONE TIME this summer. That's kind of pathetic. We windsurfed way too much! Of course the only time we go out a pigeon chooses to land on an electric wire and set the whole town of Cascade Locks on fire. 

It looks like I'm smoking a joint but I swear it's just a date.

We finally completed our one goal for the summer: Road bike to Lost Lake.

 

The Ostler Clan all agreed that Summer 2015 was the best one we have ever had. And that's all I have to say about that.

Caraz Dulzura- Back Home To Peru

Talk about super. extremely. delayed. blog posts. I went to Peru this summer! It was one of those weeks where my dad was working, my mom had left me to go to Utah, and Jessica and the babies were in Kennewick. So I turned to my baby brother Bruce and asked him if he wanted to skip LAX practice and go to Peru for the week. Casual. (Important note: I can only do this because my Dad is an airline pilot, my bank account will prove that to you.) 

I mainly wanted to go down and see my bestest and favoritest and most beautifulest Peruvian. JUANAIRIS TE QUIERO DEMASIADO. We were companions in Cusco for four and a half months and it was by far the most hilarious and magical time of my mission. We didn't have a single baptism during those cold months but I had never been happier. She taught me to be kind and sincere and did I mention how much we laughed? Life was golden. 

That's why I had to go down south and see her. WHAT A WEEK. Now for a picture overload. 

Laguna de Parón. This alpine lake is honestly the most gorgeous place I have ever been to. That is not even an exageration. That's the natural color of the water! 

We flew to Caraz from Lima and my heart swelled back to it's Peruvian size. It's like my whole soul expands to fit the entire country in a giant hug. That makes no sense but it's all I could imagine as we flew over the Andes. Fun Fact: When Bruce saw this plane he got a little nervous and asked, "are we flying in that thing?" 

This picture captures our celebrity moment. We were walking through the Yungay ruins and were stopped by these teenagers as they took about 200 pictures of us. You can tell by my mega-watt smile that I was soaking it up. As a middle schooler I always longed to be famous and this was my moment of glory! Another round of pictures for all! 

Did I mention that I am in love with this woman? 

Bruce was the best travel buddy. He couldn't speak a lick of Spanish and yet he had this smile plastered on his face the entire time. And did I mention that Peruvian ladies dig Bruce Man? 

This was at the ruins of Yungay. It was a village that was completely buried by a major landslide. All of the children had gone to a circus outside the town limits and were saved. Not much is left besides some crumpled buildings and this one-walled church. Does anyone notice my artistry of including a lone child in the photo? National Geographic are you looking at this?  

We spent an entire night dancing our hearts out in the living room to wayno, salsa, and cumbia. The whole family was dying of laughter from my dance moves. Somewhere in Peru there are a million videos of me dancing like a local. 

They say you can still hear the trapped souls of Yungay below the earth. I like to think that they're all safe with their Savior in heaven. 

We went to the Falls of Honkopampa with the young single adults. Why can't I be this popular in America? 

Bruce and Javier became the best of friends, despite the major language barrier. 

Javi wanted to take us to see "the sights" in Caraz. The only touristy thing they have in their town is a tiny little museum that boasts the TINIEST MUMMY IN THE WORLD. It's so small! How long is one supposed to look at it? I mean, it's the SMALLEST in the WORLD so it deserves some respect. Is 30 seconds enough?

Caraz! I forgot how much I loved roaming the streets of Peruvian villages. I have a feeling I may find myself moving back to Peru eventually... 

JAVI! Mi amor! This boy is crazy. He speaks about as fast as a squirrel on speed and goes out of his way to trip on things that aren't even in his path. 

Is it just me or does my body look completely broken here? It's like when Harry gets attacked by the Ossio Dispersimus spell and loses all the bones in his body. That Peruvian lady behind me totally did it. 

We ended up going to Paron on the lake's independence day from money-sucking gringos! There was a big celebration with bands and cheap food and some men trying to take a raft around the lake against a killer headwind. The banks were covered in food and flowers as a gift to... the lake Gods? I missed the part where they actually said what this was all for....

Can some Gringo go down and marry this woman and bring her back here to be my next door neighbor? Please?

I love Juana for many reasons. One of the big ones is that she slaughtered some of her own cuy to make me my favorite meal! Guinea Pig is delicious and don't bash it unless you've tasted it. 

His tiny little hand! Bruce had no idea what to eat. He repeatedly would whisper, "where's the meat on this thing?" 

Some of my favorite moments from the trip were walking the streets with Bruce and telling him about my mission and the Peruvian culture. We would stop to buy little treats like Beso de Mozas and Inka Cola at almost every corner. They're the type of moments where you want to bottle them up and save them forever and ever.

Canyon del Pato. What a sketchy place. They're a series of long, one-way tunnels that wind through a canyon with 500 foot walls jutting up on either side of you. We begged Ivan to take us in his moto taxi and I wish you could hear our screams at the moment I took this grainy picture. A one way tunnel with no lights! Where were the city planners on that one? 

Adaluz took us to get shaved ice that comes directly from the glacier. I was all gung-ho until I saw this guy dish up my ice with his long black fingernails. Just part of the experience, I suppose. 

Let's just take a moment to appreciate that swim pools in Peru have ropes that go across every five feet because no one knows how to swim. 

Due to some poor planning on my part and some severe disorganization on the part of Peruvian airports we had to take a nine hour bus ride to Lima. It's not a true South American experience without the nasty buses and only having 2 soles to share a soda. 

Words really can't capture how grateful I am for the opportunity to be reunited with my best friend. Having international friends is hard but the reunions are so sweet. 

And JUANA! Dear, sweet, kind Juana. I think it's safe to say I stole her heart and she stole mine. She couldn't resist my charming gringa-turned-latina ways. And her cuy! It's to die for. 

We spent hours chugging along in this moto taxi screaming Enrique Iglesias songs at the top of our lungs. 

Te amo Peru! 

Hermana Llacsa came and picked us up at the bus station in Lima. Guys, I am so terrified of that city. It gives me ulcers just being in it for a couple of hours. Luckily we got to the airport safely (thanks Llacsa!) and devoured some pizza. 

Welcome to America. 

First time on first class baby! If I was rich I would never ride with those coach peasants again. 

Back in Oregon! 

If you made it to this point in the post then I applaud you. This may not be witty or entertaining but I also don't get paid to blog (probably because I don't post pictures of my outfits or have perfect babies) so I will not apologize. Long live Peru! Hopefully I will be hightailing it there again veerrrrryyyy soooon.